I say to you today, my friend, I have nothing to tell you. There is nothing on my mind. I have no complaints, no words for good thoughts, no meerschaums, brier roots. I have no cheroots. I cannot give you an insight, not a handshake. I cannot hear you and you are, naturally, nowhere to be seen. I have nothing for you.
But you have no mind for any of my lacks. In fact, I believe you may enjoy my bit of nothing that I offer today, if enjoy you do. You and I are of a similar frame.